Darning Socks

Okay...so it's just my opinion - but it's right -

But American Idol SHOULD NOT renew Kara's contract. She has absolutly no idea what she's talking about!

The End.

Well, I just blogged a few days ago and didn't realize that I had left out a pretty big change in our lives. Here's the scoop...

As of May 1, I am no longer the Student Minister at Nashville Christian Church. Nicole and I made the decision in late March. I told Rick, our Senior Minister, on a Wenesday. He had a heart attack the following Friday (unrelated), so I ended my stint as youth minister at NCC by preching. It was great to be able to preach that much. I feel like I need to be preaching more, a feeling that was confirmed by many as I left NCC. Although it all happened pretty quick, we left on very good terms with the church and still have many friends there. The hardest, HARDEST, part was leaving the kids. They are awesome and we love them dearly. They have me two fantastic gifts as we left that I'll hand up in our next home to remind me daily of the two years we spent following Jesus with them.

Nicole and I have moved to Greenfield and plan to settle down here for a while. We'll move our stuff up at the end of the month when our lease at the house ends. For now we're held up in Scott and Sally's house while we look for apartments. Hopefully we'll have a place by the time we have to have our stuff out of the old house.

In related news, after a job hunt that has lasted a little over a month, I am employed at a bank (what a shift, I know). I will be a retail banker, handling the opening of savings accounts, CD's, checking accounts, etc - and will also have other responsibilities equal to that of a teller. Opportunities for advancement are numerous, so hopefully soon I'll be getting those opportunities.

You're continued prayers are welcomed as we start a new venture in life. No...we're not giving up on the church, by the way. We'll be attending Park Chapel Christian Church here in Greenfield. It is a very good church with which we are very familiar (Nicole grew up going there and I interned there after I graduated college).

Hope you all are well. We love you all.

Peace!

At several different times over the past five or six years I've tried reading Orthodoxy, the classic work by G.K. Chesterton. I've never made it past the first chapter. I mention this because I think it was in this first chapter that Chesterton mentions what has become a great apologietic for God (I, however, admit that this argument may have come from C.S. Lewis. Since the great writers of Christianity often write far above my infinitely stupid head, I sometimes get them mixed up). He states that often those who object to a loving God point to the pain and suffering in the world as proof of his non-existence. Chesterton retorts that if we have to explain pain, they have to explain beauty. Since I first read it, I've always though of this as the great apologietic. It made so much since to me. If it were all left to chance, why would chance have created beauty and pleasure? And so on...

I'm now at a point where I'm wondering about the validity of apologitics in the traditional sense, but that's another blog.

I think maybe I've had it backwards. Perhaps the great apologetic (and by apologetic I just mean, something that causes us to reach for God - no matter how we understand him) is actually pain.

Go with me here.

I was just listening to a Jar of Clay record as I cleaned out my car. It's an album called Good Monters. The seventh track is called Oh My God. The song makes great lyrical use of word pictures and creates this fast moving stream of images in the listeners mind of all the horrible scenarios there could be on earth. You think of it, they put it in the song. The first verse goes like this...

I stole this from Court. It looked like so much fun! And it was. Here's what my iPod is telling me about life. Steve Jobs knows too much.

Hey all...

I just wanted to take a quick second to share with you all three things that are awesome. First...

The second funniest thing on TV lately was the Presidential address to congress last night (Tuesday). Not because of content, but because of the ridiculous standing ovations every six sentences. I seriously watched it just to laugh at Nancy Pelosi rocketing out of her chair every three minutes. And did you see her that one time, when she started to get up - but then paused - and then saw that everyone else was standing, so then went ahead and jumped up. It was hilarious.

Secondly, the funniest thing on TV lately is the Joaquin Phoenix interview on Letterman. Here is a clip of the highlights...



Lastly, you all need to know about this website called Fabchannel. It is a website that provides free concert videos of independent (loose use of the term) bands and it has a great selection. Every genre - rock, metal, songwriters, hip hop, R&B, Soul, etc, etc. Bands like Bright Eyes, Iron & Wine, Buzzcocks, Ani DiFranco, Damien Rice, The Presidents of the United States of America, Jimmy Eat World, Azure Ray, Nada Surf - and the list goes on. Check it out, spend work time watching concerts, its a great site. The concerts are filmed in clubs in Europe and posted online. Its a community that supports independent music and its awesome. Oh ya, did I say I liked it?

Peace.

I used to be humble.

That statement in itself is arrogant, however, I think it is at least somewhat true. I think there was a time, early on, when I started taking Jesus seriously that I did act humbly in most circumstances. After all, I knew nothing about our faith. I had little biblical knowledge. I had always belonged to a 40 person church. I hadn't spent a great deal of time in study of scripture, the church, culture. I was a kid right out of high school who didn't care about scripture or the church or culture. So when I started taking Jesus seriously, I knew I had no right to make any assumptions about anything. My opinions were tendered with hesitation and often given the disclaimer of "I"m new at this, so I could be way off base." I knew that Jesus was real, I knew that he died for me, I knew that he wanted me to love others. I also knew that I thought he was calling me to preach. Which made the not knowing thing tough to deal with. So, I studied and prayed and, after some hesitancy, preached. I only had something to say because of scripture and because I felt called to, I preached, despite this feeling in my gut that said, "Hey, many of these people have been Christians longer than you've been alive. What could you possibly say to them?" I had no answer, so I just prayed and studied and preached. And here's the big one - I learned. I sought out people who could teach me and had conversations. I took every opportunity to listen to what people around me had to say. And I learned.

I remember the moment where it all started to change, the moment where I knew that I would not always be humble (if I ever really was). I was sitting in the fellowship hall of my home church in Fairfield, IL. There were about 10-12 of us sitting around a few tables and I made a comment about scripture. I forget the gist of the comment, but I know that the Red Sea was involved because after I said the comment I asked, "It was the Red Sea, right?"

Ten or fifteen minutes later one of the ladies who went to our church made a comment about me. She said that one of the reasons my preaching was so touching was because it came from an honest, humble place. And then she referenced my asking if it was the Red Sea. And right then and there, because she gave me such a nice compliment, I had a moment of pride. Now, I don't necessarily think there was anything wrong with me thinking, "Wow, that makes me feel good. I really appreciate that comment." The moment where it changed was the following thought I had. I thought, "I wonder what happens when I loose that innocence, that naivety. What will happen when I do know a lot. Will I still be an honest and humble preacher. Or will I just be another guy that knows it all, who certainly is not humble in spirit?"

I've been reminded this morning that it has all definitely changed. I now know quite a bit about scripture, church and culture and I have a lot of opinions about things that fall into the category of "religious" and "spiritual" and "church

I sat in a circle of good men and women this morning and had the same, nearly identical, conversation with them about the same issue - which I thought was tired and board - and I thought I knew what both sides were interested in and what both sides were going to say, and of course, I thought I knew the answer. This topic and issues aren't important. What is important is that I was only partly right - and my attitude was completely wrong. I sat as I listened to a wise man named Jerry tell us that we needed to do both things we were talking about, that they were inclusive of each other and not mutually exclusive. And despite the fact that I was quite bored with the conversation, I came away having gotten a large dose of humility. My opinions are still that of an opinionated, naive youngster who may have knowledge, but who often times lacks wisdom. That young man came up against true wisdom and humility today - and he lost.

I am realizing this morning that humility goes a long way, and I need it. I'm often time too hellbent on my way, my view, my frustration, my, my, my - and I'm wrong. I'm realizing that I need to be making a concerted effort to put myself in a position of learning. I need humility. I don't know how to get it and I'm sure it'll take a lifetime to maintain, but I want to live in humility. God forgive me for the years that I have walked proudly. May I, may we, walk humbly before the Lord.

I remember being scared on the playground in middle school. Our Jr. high took up a whole block in the middle of our small town. The front half of the block was the school building, built in the middle part of the last century, the back half was a large gravel playground, a large basketball court with four goals and a large section of grass that held a kickball field. I was at the opposite end of the gravel part, as far from the doors as possible, when the bell rang signaling the end of recess and the beginning of another snooze-fest. I cannot remember what prompted the thought that prompted the fear, but what I felt is accurately described as fear. Not fear that paralyzes, just fear that makes you respect the scope of something.

So, what was I thinking about?

Marriage. For those of you laughing you either know what I mean or think that I'm joking. I'm not joking. As I walked across the gravel to class, I wondered what would happen if I married the wrong person. I wondered if she'd be pretty. I wondered if I'd be happy. Some pretty deep stuff for middle school. I had that feeling in the pit of your stomach that comes with fear, and then I convinced myself that there's no way I could make the wrong decision because I would not marry someone I didn't love. I remember having that thought a couple of times around that age.

I'm not scared anymore. I've made my choice and never regretted it. My wife has brought to me the greatest times in my life and has changed me, in ways that many will never know, for the better. She, sometimes even more than God (although I know that's maybe not how it's supposed to be), has inspired and shown me how to be a follower of Jesus, and how to be in relationship.

There's a story that not many of you know. We were in Florida with my parents and two her friends once. She tried to talk to me about some things that were going on. I responded by trying to break up with her. We fought, cried and talked through the night. She fought me for...me. And as I took a bathroom break from the conversation I realized that I was going to marry her and that when I did, I'd tell this story, sometime, as a testament to my appreciation of my wife, the one who fought for me, to make me better than I am.

As many of you do know, we still fight. But many times when we're "passionately disagreeing" - you know, when we're fighting and we're both like "Who did I marry?" - these words ring in my ears...

"For better or for worse. For richer or for poorer. In sickness and in health."

Now, I know that some of you may read this and think, "What, why here. This is weird. Awkward." - But I have my reasons. The only people who read this are our friends and family, and so I wanted to take a few minutes of a random day, unprompted, to again declare semi-publicly, that I am married to the woman I hoped I'd be married to all those years ago on the playground. The one who dispels all the fear.

Nicole, my beloved. I love you.